Turns Out We're All Starving for the Same Thing
How to Ask Your Friends About Your Friendship | 🎙️ Episode 8
I did not expect this show to change my own friendships.
I thought I was making something for you. A campfire for other people to gather around. I’d show up, have the conversations, send them out into the world, and hope they brought joy and deeper connections to others. That was the plan.
What I didn’t plan for was my own friends showing up in my inbox differently. Saying things they hadn’t said before. Asking questions they’d never thought to ask. One told me the show had sparked something - a deep joy and appreciation for friendship she hadn’t stopped to feel in years. One told me, hilariously, that she wanted to defend me to my other friends. (I’m still not entirely sure what that means but I am completely here for it.) One told me to stop apologizing so much. To give myself the grace I give everyone else.
I have been talking to my friends my whole life.
And somehow, making a show about friendship is the thing that finally made me talk to them about the friendship itself.
That’s what this week’s episode is about. Not a guest, just me, halfway through the season, wanting to sit with you for a minute before we keep going. Because something powerful is happening around this campfire that I didn’t see coming, and I think it matters more than we knew.
Women are reaching out to friends they’d lost. Forwarding episodes to sisters with no note except this is us. Making teary phone calls from their cars. Sending the text they’d been sitting on for months. And every guest who has sat across from me - single one - has said some version of the same thing: I’ve never been asked these questions before.
Who among us has?
I have a feeling that if you went to your person this week, the one whose face just appeared in your mind, and asked her something real about your friendship itself, something would shift. I know it because I’ve watched it happen, episode after episode, in my own life and in yours.
When you finally turn the lens that way, something powerful shifts. Your friendship becomes more intentional, more honest, more seen.
This episode is my attempt to give you the questions. And to tell you: you don’t need a podcast to ask them.
This episode is for anyone who has spent years talking to their friends and never once talked about the friendship itself.
Oh and stay tuned to the episode to hear a little teaser of who’s coming up in the back half of the season. I genuinely cannot wait for you to meet who’s coming to this couch next.
“We talk to our friends for hours, for decades, and we almost never talk about the friendship itself. But when you do? Something shifts.”
Amy’s Friend Pick:
Social Print Studio — my favorite place to print photos of my friends. Because the people who matter deserve to be on your walls, not just your camera roll.
Here’s a snapshot of my friendship wall, made with their square prints:
Join the campfire:
What question would you most want to ask your closest friend?
Go strike up a conversation over coffee or your weighted vest walk.
(Today, not tomorrow.)Start with this: What’s your favorite memory of us?
Or be brave and ask: What do you most need from me?
Then come back and tell me what happened.
Listen, Share, Connect:
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💌 Share with the friend who became family and tag us to win a handwritten note and a little something in the mail
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*A favorite friend of yours, and mine!, is coming back: This time to talk about the joy of co-watching your favorite shows with friends, and which ones about friendship we’re most obsessed with right now. Get your own lists ready, my friends, it’s going to be a good one.